Singapore Golf Forum - Golf Republic
Would you like to react to this message? Create an account in a few clicks or log in to continue.


Golf Republic Forum - Singapore's most active golfing forum.
 
HomeLatest imagesRegisterLog in

 

 Management Directions

Go down 
2 posters
AuthorMessage
puteh83
Senior Golfer
Senior Golfer
puteh83


Posts : 479
Join date : 2009-06-22

Management Directions Empty
PostSubject: Management Directions   Management Directions I_icon_minitimeWed Oct 14, 2009 4:40 pm

Dear employees,

Due to the current financial situation caused by the slowdown of economy, Management has decided to implement a scheme to put workers of 40 years of age and above on early retirement. This scheme will be known as RAPE(Retire Aged People Early).

Persons selected to be RAPED can apply to management to be eligible for the SHAFT scheme (Special Help After Forced Termination). Persons who have been RAPED and SHAFTED will be reviewed under the SCREW programme (Scheme Covering Retired Early Workers). A person may be RAPED once, SHAFTED twice and SCREWED as many times as Management deems appropriate.

Persons who have been RAPED can only get AIDS (Additional Income for Dependants & Spouse) or HERPES (Half Earnings for Retired Personnel Early Severance).
Obviously persons who have AIDS or HERPES will not be SHAFTED or SCREWED any further by Management.

Persons who are not RAPED and are staying on will receive as much shito (Special High Intensity Training) as possible. Management has always prided itself on the amount of shito it gives employees. Should you feel that you do not receive enough shito, please bring to the attention of your Supervisor. They have been trained to give you all the shito you can handle.

Sincerely,
The Management
Back to top Go down
watermyforrest
Incredibly Active Golfer
Incredibly Active Golfer
watermyforrest


Posts : 3248
Join date : 2009-07-17
Age : 49
Location : Serangoon Central

Management Directions Empty
PostSubject: Re: Management Directions   Management Directions I_icon_minitimeWed Oct 14, 2009 4:42 pm

cheers
Back to top Go down
 
Management Directions
Back to top 
Page 1 of 1

Permissions in this forum:You cannot reply to topics in this forum
Singapore Golf Forum - Golf Republic :: The 19th Hole :: Jokes & Humours-
Jump to:  
Friends of Golf RepublicFriends of Golf RepublicFriends of Golf Republic
Copyright © 2009 Golf Republic. All Rights Reserved.